Love in a Box
It’s Valentine’s Day. A day of love and appreciation. A day to take a moment to celebrate those who are walking by your side on this journey of life. Closeness comes to mind. Closeness in sharing your thoughts and feelings, being true to who you are and vulnerable with those you choose. My thoughts go to the physical closeness that James, Kaia and I get to share every day on our adventure in full-time RV living. A whopping 335 square feet of closeness. That is the sum total of living space we have for two adults and a dog- our own happy box. To put this in perspective, a standard hotel room is between 300-400 square feet. So now think of this, your belongings, clothes, dishes, tools, hobbies, bedding, supplies, computer, and food all moved into a hotel room. Sure, you have your outdoor space that you can use on nice days. Yet a good number of hours are spent in that 335 square feet. Some of you are thinking that sounds wonderful. To strip your life of all the things you caretake and live a simpler existence with a minimalistic mindset is incredibly freeing. We are, most of the time, in that camp too. Some of you…not so much. Some of you are thinking, no way could I divest myself of the things that I enjoy and the elbow room that I have. Well, truth be told, we have days like that too! There are days I long for my office to escape to and read or to go downstairs to put a puzzle together while James watches a scary movie upstairs.
One of the considerations of this lifestyle is how much space you need or want. If you think about it, we really don’t NEED a ton of space. People live in small spaces everyday and they thrive. I think of those that live in tiny homes, studio apartments, dorm rooms etc. It is what we choose to spread out in and what we become accustom to filling. And boy can I fill a space! This became abundantly clear during our move. What doesn’t look like a lot in a room sure fills up a storage unit quickly.
James and I were recently watching a show where buyers and a host look at different homes to see which ones they want to buy. I was marveling at some of the comments from the homebuyers. “We are looking for 5 bedrooms and 6 baths for when company comes (they were empty nesters).” And “this kitchen is way too small for me to cook in and has only a 6-person island?” And my favorite “I have 200+ pairs of shoes so I need a place for them in their own room.” We laughed watching the show. Not for the differences in what people want in their living spaces… to each their own. Rather, that we were just talking about our desire to upgrade to a larger 5th wheel with a garage under the master suite and a larger kitchen with a professional range. Oh yeah … 410 square feet of lappable luxury!
What is it about the need for wanting more, for increasing the size of our livable box? There are psychological components that drive us. Our need for freedom and control, reducing stress of clutter and confinement, societal expectations, and prospering expectations we put upon ourselves. Our Western culture values individualism and space helps us achieve that along with our need for privacy. With that said, we are thrilled with our current space. It is everything we need and then some. Yet still there is a desire for bigger, or more. A recent conversation with a woman’s group I belong to helped to minimize some of my guilt in thinking I wasn’t appreciative of what I have and what I get to do. I am truly thankful for this lifestyle AND I would love more creature comforts. It doesn’t have to be mutually exclusive. One of the women encouraged me to look at my heart. Is the desire for more coming from lack of appreciation or is it coming from a place that it would be nice but not necessary? Definitely the latter. It is a moot point as our dream 5th wheel is not in the budget…yet.
I was warned before we started this adventure about the inevitable stair-step sizing upgrade. First it would be camper: Prior to our current abode, we did both stand inside a 22-foot camper, 1/3 of which was garage, and looked deeply into each other’s eyes. James asked, “Which one of us would take out the other first?” As the walkway in that unit was less to do with walking and more of a “stand next to each other” setup, we decided it was in both of our best interests to get something a tish bigger. More recently, an ever-so brief walk through an RV show in Florida revealed that you can drop a million dollars on a mobile hotel room and golly it sure is something. But reality rears its head and you double check that list of needs and wants. I said a quick prayer to repel the shiny objects and focused on what’s important. The adventure we’re walking together is more important than granite countertops and my beloved stand mixer, and vacuum, and Cricut, and large curved screen monitor, and crafting supplies, and adjustable bed... I digress. Honestly, I am so grateful that I get to share this space with the love of my life and our wonderful dog. All 335 square feet.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
